Why Spouses Should Be Invited To Company Parties.

I worked full-time until Cara was one year old. In all that time of working during college and post-college I only attended two company holiday parties. I then joined the ranks of the stay at home moms with no corporation to celebrate Yuletide cheer. Relying fully on my husbands income, I've only been a guest at one company party. That's SEVEN YEARS and only ONE!!! Some years I could have cared less but this year I really could have gone for a night of dressing up and mingling (a cash bar would be a nice addition). I am thinking maybe they just don't know what they are missing by doing luncheons or neglecting it all together. It's time to tell them why.

Why I, the spouse, should be invited...

#1 Spouses are the reason your employee is available. 

Ok sometimes we mess things up but mostly, my handling of the home-front leaves Carter available to go above and beyond. Staying after hours, being on call, having a clear head for meetings, that is because I am at Kroger, making dinner or doing homework with the girls. You're welcome. Now feed me and let me dance a little. 

#2 I am your advocate/antagonist

I'm a problem solver psycho. When he comes home I suck the daily issues out of him. Ok so I don't do that much anymore because it is (A) not necessary, (B) annoying and (C) frankly it can just about kill me sometimes. I can't make him or you follow through with my ingenious solutions. Really, you all should listen to me. When I am given the privilege of positive and negative work tales, I can be your best friend or worst enemy. A chance to cut loose and eat banquet or buffet style (I'm not picky) would tip the scales in your favor. 

#3 Analyzing has begun. 

After hearing about you, I feel like I know you. Picking apart your personalities and work habits aids in my problem solving sessions. One previous employer owes me a weekend at a bed and breakfast because of the dysfunctional characters I tried to juggle. Holy moly they should never have wanted to interact with me. No hard feelings there for the lack of Christmas fellowship. I'm good. The best gift was his 2 weeks notice.
Give me a chance to form my opinions based on first hand observation. Right now it is all funneled through my husband. I promise to stop taking notes after your second drink.

#4 I've been told that I am fun.
Great asset to your party. I swear to keep all comedy within HR guidelines. There will be cheers of "Carter your wife is great!" the next work day. This is a bonus for Carter also. Endearing. As a matter of fact I am thinking he should take me on interviews too (side note: I am pretty sure we are finished with interviews. I'm way too fond of this place and my shoe discount).

Of course I know these events are costly and time consuming to organize. No, this will never change the mind of CEO's. I feel confident that a lot of employees despise these events.  This year I could've used a reason to let my hair down (or up depending on the outfit and hair behavior that day), find a babysitter and be at my husbands side. Just to have fun. This is why spouses (I) should be invited.